Reserve vs. Active Duty

Will dropped a bombshell on us this week.

He's considering switching from Army Reserves to Active Duty Army.

!!!

He hasn't gone to Basic Training, yet, so making the switch now will be easier than at any other point in his military service.  He has been going to his Reserve drill weekends every month ever since July.  I think it is the drill weekends that have made him change his mind.  He feels that his service in the Reserves is not meaningful enough.  Their unit building is run down.  Command has not bothered to check in with the unit in a long time.  He feels like what he is doing there is a sham, I guess.  He also feels that his MOS (Army job) isn't what he wanted.  He's scheduled to be training in Chemical Operations, but he actually always wanted to be a door gunner on a helicopter.  There is no MOS for that, so in order to qualify for it, you have to become a helicopter mechanic and work your way up to Crew Chief.  And only on helicopters that have door gunners.

Great.

I can understand how he feels.  I appreciate it.  I do.  I was concerned when he joined that he didn't take long enough choosing his MOS.  I wanted to go home and sleep on it, but the recruiter told him that if he didn't choose right away, the jobs with the signing bonuses would potentially be gone.  Ten thousand dollars is a strong incentive!

So.  Here we are.

I was very comfortable with the arrangements as they are.  He would only be gone for 6 months, then home again to do drill weekends, go to school, get a job (possibly as an EMT, since he is working on his certification right now), even move out and have college adventures.  But all of it would be right here, close to home.  I wouldn't have to say "good-bye".

All of that would change if he choses to go Active Duty.

After Basic and AIT (Advanced Individual Training, aka, job training), he would go off to whatever duty station the Army assigned him to.  He would be gone.

I can't tell you how much my heart hurts right now to even think of it.

My kids have been growing up at a nice, slow pace.  Helena is at home, going to school, working, dating... having adventures that don't take her too far away from me.  She still likes to plan us into her life and, most importantly, do things with me.

Will wants to leave.  I'm not ready for that!  Is he ready for that?  I'm not sure.  He still needs me to get him up in the mornings and cook him breakfast.

I picture him far from home, with no family to turn to when he is lonely or depressed.  What if he struggles to make friends?  I worry about his spiritual well being, too.  He doesn't go to church; will he find God when he is on his own?

GAH!  I'm an emotional mess!  Why do they have to grow up?!?

He leaves for drill weekend right after school today, so we won't be able to do anything about this until next week.  I don't even know if it is possible to make the switch, anyways.  Still, it is going to be a tough weekend for me, and possibly a tough spring... if I find out that I'll have to say "good-bye" this summer.