Flashback Friday No. 5 - 1993

December 24, 1993


We are in Seattle.  Helena did pretty well on take off & during the flight; but she did not like the descent into Seattle.  It hurt my ears, so I'm sure it hurt hers.  There were an extra 5,000 feet to descend because of the difference in altitude level.


A really interesting moment occurred while we were waiting in the Salt Lake City Airport.  Everywhere I go with Helena, women look at me with a new light in their eyes.  Women with children have a knowing, friendly, conspirational look.  I didn't think much of it until the incident in the airport.  An Arab family walked by while I was holding Helena.  The wife/mother was heavily veiled so only her eyes showed.  Yet her eyes held that exact same look I had seen on other women's faces, and I am sure she was smiling. Her very foreign-ness made me realize that Motherhood is a binding universal sisterhood, as well.  A commonality that can bring cultures together in peace and joy.  It truly is the greatest calling of all.  What a wonderful world this would be if loving mothers controlled everything.  Perhaps it still could be if more children were as the Armies of Helaman who valued the words and teachings of their mothers.


Of course, I cannot write on Christmas Eve without reflecting on the birth of Him whom we honor on this day (or tomorrow, in any event).  As I hold Helena, I think; 'Christ was once a tiny baby, just like her."  Then I think of what he has done for all mankind and I marvel at it.


*****


Merry Christmas, everyone!

Flashback Friday No. 4 - 1992 - AKA: "How I Met Your Father"

Helena has a new favorite TV sit-com.  It is called "How I Met Your Mother".  I thought I'd borrow the title (with a slight twist) for the title of this post.  My life is not a sit-com, of course.  But the title fits.

I promised last week that Flashback Friday this week would be a flashback to the day I met Bill.  So, in honor of that promise, here it is!

*****

December 6, 1992


Well, I've done it again.  I must be the most fickle girl in the world.


My relationship with Kevin has been developing slowly but surely.  We spend a lot of time with each other and I am very sorry to say, he has been a serious distraction to my studies.


On Friday night (tonight being Sunday) Kevin and I went ice-skating and had a good time.  Then, on Saturday, two of my room-mates and I decided to go ice-skating again.  Tina had never been, and Sheri had only been once, in 2nd grade.


So we went.  I was having a good time teaching them to skate, when all of a sudden, an extremely good looking man skated by.  I smiled at him and he smiled back.  I was smitten.  I smiled at him several times and even said "hi".  I noticed that he seemed to be alone and I decided to go up to him and strike a conversation.


I skated right up to him and asked "Are you here alone?"  Indeed he was.  We ended up skating together for the rest of the evening.  In fact, when my room-mates were ready to leave, he asked if I could drop them off and come back; because he wanted to skate with me some more.  So I did.


I found out his name is William Doyle Watson (Bill for short) and he is 22.  Unfortunately, he has not been to college.  I say unfortunately because I am extremely attracted to him and I have always imagined that I could not date anyone who is less educated than I.  (Oh, I was an arrogant idiot!  And it is rather ironic that my grammar is all shot to... well, you get the idea.)  Also unfortunately because my mother did not sound too pleased about the fact that I liked an "uneducated" man.


He may not know as much about ancient cultures and modern philosophies as I, but he knows how to be a perfect gentleman and there was nothing coarse or unrefined about his manners.


He held my hand while we skated, and he bought drinks for myself and my room-mates (at least, he would have bought my room-mates drinks, but they declined)  He is around 6 feet tall and has dark sandy blond (brownish) hair and beautiful blue eyes.  His smile would melt the hardest of hearts.  He is working as a construction worker, but that is not what he wants to do in life.  It sounded like he was interested in attending college.


Do I sound twitter-pated?


The rink was closed early due to all of the snowfall (it was snowing heavily the whole time), so Bill asked me to have dinner with him.  We went to a restaurant called Shashoney's (I am not sure if that is the correct spelling) [It was Shoney's, actually]  We had a wonderful time.  He kept holding my hand, opening doors for me, and being a total gentleman. 


After dinner, he drove me back to my car (which we had left at the skating rink parking lot), then he got out and scraped the windows for me!  Then I told him I had a wonderful time & he said "me too, I didn't expect to be going on a date tonight!"  Then he gave me a hug and kissed me on the cheek.


It all seems so unreal!  It is like a fairytale or a dream!


Oh!  Once when we were going around one of the curves on the rink, some teenage girls (I'd guess they were 10th grade) hollered "Hey, is she your girlfriend?"; and Bill said "Yes"  I laughed and told him they were probably really disappointed.


So, now:  What do I do?  Should I tell Kevin about my "one night stand"?  He is the one who said he wasn't ready to be committed to dating just one person.  If Bill never calls me, then does Kevin really need to know?  Or, if Bill does call & I start dating him, how will I tell Kevin & what will that do to him?  Does the fact that I am extremely attracted to Bill mean that I have been fooling myself about my true feelings for Kevin?  So many questions!  Can I feel right about dating both of them; and is it moral/ethical to kiss two different guys at the same time?  I don't know why I am stressing, he probably will never call.


This has all come at the worst possible time.  Finals are this week and I am failing French.  C'est la vie.

*****

Some of that is embarrassing to put out there.  But, I promised not to self edit.  So that is the real deal.  Exactly what was going through my 22 year old head.

So weird to read that almost 20 years later!

I am so grateful for the journal entries I wrote while we were dating!  Life is not easy, and our marriage has been through some ups and downs (as it has for every one, I'm sure).  We were so young, full of life, optimism, and love.

Everyone entertains the thought "If I knew then what I know now, would I have made the same choice?" ....at least once in their lives.  Most of us ask ourselves that question often.

The answer might change, depending on the circumstances at the time.  But at this very moment I can say I would do everything the same.  Love you, Bill!

Flashback Friday No. 3 - 1991

December 10, 1991


I only have a few minutes in which to write, because today is the last day of my Physical Science class & I decided to attend for once.  Class starts in a little over 10 minutes.


Today is Natalie's 21st Birthday!  I've made her a cake & I'm bringing her a bottle of sparkling cider because she brought me a bottle for my 21st birthday.


Family Home Evening yesterday was a joke.  We tried to organize a trip to Temple Square, but couldn't find enough transportation.  So then no one wanted to go through with planning an alternative.  We ended up going to a movie again, as always, because we couldn't think of anything fun & cheap to do.  I should state, however, that Dave Peterson and Melanie Mills showed up out of the 10 members of the FHE group not living in Shipp 113.  I'm sick of FHE & my FHE group.


Tomorrow is the last class day & we've only a week until finals.  I'm going to have to study alot, & pray some, too, if I hope to do well on my finals!  I can't wait until they are over!  I want to go home.

*****

This was written while I was a student at BYU.  The first paragraph includes a confession.  There were certain classes in my college career that didn't get much face time from me.  I showed up on the first week, picked up the syllabus, and listened to the first lecture or two.  If the class didn't hold my interest, I did my studying at home in the textbook (following the syllabus) and turned up at the testing center on the dates listed in the syllabus to take the tests.  This only worked on those beastly large classes that every undergrad is required to take.  You know, the lecture hall filled with over 600 students all taking notes on whatever the minuscule dot of a man at the front of the room was droning on and on about.  I'd end up pulling a low B or a C in the class and just walk away grateful that one was over with.

In fact, here is an amusing side story about one particular class.  American Heritage is the beast of a class at BYU that EVERYONE must take to get an undergrad degree at that school.  I never went to the lecture.  But there were smaller lab classes that were required and attendance at those was mandatory, since they actually took roll there.  On the first day, the TA running the class called roll for the first time.  When he got to "Katharina Weierholt" on the list he paused and said, "Are you Norwegian?"  Thinking he'd said "Is your name Norwegian?"  I quickly responded with "Yes."  After a bit of reflecting, though, I realized I'd just told this guy that I was, in fact, from Norway.  Oops.

The class was deadly boring.  I decided I'd spice it up (for myself, anyway) by pretending that I WAS from Norway!  This, of course, meant I had to speak in an accent, if I was ever called upon to speak in class.  Which was never, so the accent thing was pretty easy...

...until the day I was sitting in the back of the room, not paying attention.

TA:  "...and has anyone here been inside a European cathedral?"

Me:  (thinking, 'hey, if I'm from Norway, I probably have.  I have no idea what he's even talking about, and I haven't really, but, more than half the class is raising their hands, so he won't call on me in the back.')  Raise hand.

TA:  "Katharina!  Will you tell us what it was like?"

Me:  ('Crap!  How does he even remember my name?  Now what?!?')  "Vell,  Eet vas verry, verry, beeg.  And I felt so verry, verry smøll.  Eet is so verry old.  Een zee aisles, zee floor ees ahl vorn avay, from ahl zee øthare feet who ahve been zaire beefore you.  You feel so  eensigneeficant."

No kidding.  (If any of my Norwegian cousins are reading this, I have to give you a great big apology!  I admit, I was a complete and utter idiot and you deserve better than to be related to me.)

And his response?

TA:  "YES!!!  THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT!"

Me:  ('Whew!  I am NEVER raising my hand again!') As I slink down in my seat and hope a hole opens up and swallows me whole.

Back to the journal post.  The second paragraph is about my best friend, Natalie.  She was a best friend all growing up and was also at BYU.  We've known each other since we were 10.  We have grown apart over the years, but still keep in touch once a year at Christmas time.  I got her Christmas card in the mail, today, in fact.  She lives in Southern California now, a fact that I try not to be too envious over. ;)

The next part of the journal post is about Family Home Evening at school.  Family Home Evening is one evening of the week dedicated to spending time as a family.  Usually held on a Monday night.  Great for actual families.  Rather goofy and pointless for single college students.  I think it was just another BYU attempt at the 'mix and mingle let's help these singles find a soul mate' gig.  I did NOT find my soul mate at a single's FHE get together.  Obviously, from the tone of this post.

And finally, you can tell from the final sentence just how homesick I was.  Living 900 miles away from all family is tough when you are young and single.  But it is interesting to note that in almost exactly a year, I would meet my future husband on December 6, 1992!  (Yes, there is a post about that.  Maybe you'll get that one next week.)

Flashback Friday No. 2

December 11, 2005


We held our Family Home Evening with the "Jesus Present" last week.  This has been a family tradition ever since the kids were little.  We wanted to remind the children that Jesus should be the focus of our celebrations.  Every year, therefore, we discuss what we could give to Jesus in the new year.  We try to set goals to become more Christlike, or ways to make ourselves better disciples.  This year I plegdged to be more optimistic and look less grumpy.  I also pledged to write in my journal every Sunday this year (yes, today is Sunday).  My final gift is to exercise 3X each week.


That last one is my Achilles heel, so to speak.  I know I am happier when I exercise, I feel better about myself, too.  I struggle w/getting out of bed in the mornings.  I need to force myself to go to bed on time!  I will try to report on my progress each week.


Yesterday I had a fairly bad day.  Our clothes dryer is broken, Bill was gone all day helping Necia move, & Helena neglected to call me & ask if she could stay late at a party at Sis. Millward's house.  I sat at the computer fuming while waiting for the printer to finish.


Then I started watching my screen saver.  It cycles through all of the photos on my computer.  Image after image portraying happy children, family celebrations, & good times presented themselves to my view.  My mood lifted as I was reminded of sweet & happy moments.  I think that is one important reason to journal & keep photographic record of our lives.  It lifts our spirits and reminds us of better times when life has us down.

*****

So.  We've fallen out of the practice of using the "Jesus Present".  Perhaps we should revive that one.  On the surface, it looks a bit like a New Year's resolution gig.  However, it was really a way to try to focus the kids on the Savior at a time when they were constantly bombarded with advertisements for the hottest have-to-have-it piece o' crap toys of the season.  It was my bid at trying to get the kids to think of Jesus and not "gimme, gimme, gimme!"  The "Jesus Present" was always the first gift to go under the tree every year.  It was a wrapped gift box that could be easily opened each year.  During a family meeting, we would read aloud last year's gifts to Jesus and talk about how we did at living up to them.  Then we would talk about what we could do this year to become better Christians and write down the "gifts" each family member wanted to "give" to Jesus for the following year.  Often the kids gifts involved being nicer to each other.

The "Jesus Present" wasn't our only bid for a more Christ centered Christmas, of course.  But it was a really nice one.  We should bring it back.

As for the screen saver, I still have it (and still have that same slow old junky computer, in fact).  I occasionally get sucked into sitting there just watching it.  It never fails to bring warm happy remembrances of all the years of fun and laughter.  I need to buy one (or several) of those digital picture frames and place them strategically about the house.  I think it would build stronger family bonds and lift spirits around here to have constantly rotating reminders of all the good times!

Flashback Friday

So, I got to thinking about all those old journals.  The bound book journals dating all the way back to 1979.  In the event of a fire, all of them would be lost.  While I was not a dedicated writer (in the earliest books, more than a year could go by between entries), there are thoughts and experiences in them that I have completely forgotten.  That is the power of writing, of course.  You can capture the moment and relive it years later, often with a chuckle.

So, I got to thinking, it might be fun to 'flash back' to some of those earlier versions of... well.. me!

And so, here is the birth of "Flashback Friday".  I'll try to find an old journal entry from roughly the same date, but from a different year.  I'll keep the original spellings, grammar, and punctuation.  I may even have some commentary, too.

Here goes!

*****

Nov. 26, 1988


     Thanksgiving was 2 days ago.  We had invited Aunt Avis & John to join us for the day & they graciously accepted.  They were to arrive at 1:00 pm, so we spent the morning finishing cleaning the house & getting ourselves ready.  Mom put the finishing touches on the dinner preparations
     They finally arrived at 2:00 pm.  We visited until 4:00, then sat down to enjoy the meal.  There was a huge turkey, squash, candied yams, peas, stuffing, bread (rolls that Avis made) & much more.
     After dinner, we visited for a while longer & then had dessert.  There was a choice of pumpkin pie, cherry pie, or chocolate cake, & you could have either ice-cream or whipped cream with it.
     John is still dating Diana & he said he sees her about twice a week.  He lives in Tacoma now, sharing an apartment with 2 other guys.
     About Jim.  He turned out to be a flake.  His one & only love is computers.  He also seems contemptuous about the "young" age of 18.  He never puts me down, but he certainly derides others.  You see, he's at the venerable old age of 26.
     Jim is much better looking than John, in appearance.  John, however, is a more beautiful person, inside.  I wish things could be different.
     However, I gave John my address & he promised he'd write.  I won't get my hopes up too high, just in case.

*****

Wow.  What a random blast from the past that was!

First off, "Aunt" Avis was NOT my aunt.  She was the mother of my dad's best friend growing up.  They lived near Poulsbo, WA at that time.  My dad helped dig the hole for their swimming pool when he was a teen.

John was her youngest son.  You may have gathered that I had a bit of a crush on him.  Not long after this, he became my first official boyfriend... and my first kiss.  That's right.  I had "virgin lips" (a phrase coined by my daughter and her friend) until I was 18 years old.  I wish I could tell you that my first kiss was magical.  It was so far from that!  He was a wet, sloppy kisser.  Ugh!  Our relationship was doomed to failure because he was a devout Lutheran and I was (and still am) a Mormon.  He felt it was his duty to explain to me all of the reasons my religious views were faulty and every date turned into a religious argument (he called them 'debates').  I never wanted to talk religion, he just couldn't let it rest.  I ended the relationship after only a few months.  My parents were relieved.  Dad always hated the idea of me dating John.

As for this Jim character, I don't even remember him at all.  I have no idea what he looked like or how I knew him.  I do know one thing, though, he was WAY TOO OLD!  Twenty six?!?  What was I thinking?!?  I obviously thought that 18 was a mature and grown up age, even though I was living with my parents, had no responsibilities, and driving one of their cars around.  Sheesh!  What is it about the teenage brain that is in such a hurry to be an adult?  Whoever Jim was, he had a right to be 'contemptuous'.  I was barely legal and he was completely right to steer clear of me.  So very creepy to realize that my daughter is the same age I was when I wrote this entry.  I can't imagine her interested in a 26 year old!  Ugh and double ugh!

There you go.  What did you think of "Flashback Friday"?  Is it worth a second go round next week?