Crybabies

This week we had another assembly at school.  One of the new teachers (at least, new to Harvest Elementary... he was my children's 4th grade science teacher at Shelley Elementary), remarked that we have already had more assemblies this fall than they had all year at his old school.

Anyways, this assembly was the Rhinestone Roper Drug Free Extravaganza!  This guy, Dan Mink, came WITH HIS HORSE to entertain all the kids with trick roping, bullwhip target hitting, and messages about finding your 'special purpose' in life, and staying away from drugs and alcohol.

Everyone was LOVING the assembly, at least until he pulled out his bullwhip and let it crack a few times.  Suddenly, a kindergarten girl popped up from the front row and ran straight into the arms of her teacher, bawling in fright!  She was settled down and sent back to her seat after being reassured that she would not get hurt, I guess.

I was very impressed with a couple of 4th grade students who volunteered to come up on stage and each held a long piece of straw out for him to target with the bullwhip!  The girl held it in her hand, the boy held it in his mouth.  That took a lot of courage!

Later in the assembly, the performer went outside and brought in his horse, Lucky Joe.  Almost immediately, another kindergartner was sobbing in her teacher's arms, inconsolable and wanting to go home!  Oi!  Apparently large animals frighten her?

Really, though, it was a super cool assembly!

Yesterday, I was teaching my first graders about Primary and Secondary colors.  The students were supposed to find a true blue, a true red, and a true yellow out of the crayon box so they could blend them to make orange, green, and violet.  As I was walking around watching them work, I came across a little boy who was SOBBING!

I asked him, "What's wrong?"

He replied, "I c-c-can't f-f-f-ind the ri-ri-right col-ors!"

?!?

Now, I know that this little boy was only 6,  but after having dealt with literally thousands of children over the past 12 years, I was annoyed.

I told him, "Stop crying right now!  Crying won't help you solve your problem!  If you are bleeding or hurt you can cry, but crying won't help you find the crayons you need, so just stop it!"

Amazingly, but not really surprisingly, he did; though there was still a hitch in his breathing.

"Now, what CAN you do that will help you get the colors you need?" I asked him.

He instantly answered, "I c-c-could ask someone to sh-sh-share."

"Good plan.  Do that!"

Of course, the rest of the kids were watching avidly to see how the art teacher treats kids who are crying.  They seemed satisfied that I wasn't too scary, because they all went back to work, and the little boy was smiling and happy within a few moments.

Crybabies are just a part of life in school.  When they are little like the kindergarten girl (the second one, not the first... I get being scared by the whip), or the first grade boy, it is easier to deal with.  All little kids cry at some time or another, so there is no 'shame' involved.  It gets more painful for the child the higher up the grade levels you go.  A third grader who cries might be teased about it on the playground for the rest of the day by the other children, but it is quickly forgotten by the next day.  A sixth grader who is a crybaby?  He's/She's just signed up for a year's worth of shunning by his/her peers.  That turns really ugly and has even turned violent on a couple of occasions.  I am not saying it is right, or that the kids ought to treat each other that way.  Of course not!  But that is often the reality, especially when large numbers of kids congregate on playgrounds, and that is why I won't accept useless tears, even from a 6 year old.